Im off tomorow to go to a wedding. Im kind of excited to go. Ive never been to one before and I dont know what it is about them that I love so much. Everyone I talk to about them are like its just a wedding there not that big of a deal. To me they are, although alot of people dont take them seriously anymore and half of them will probably end up in divorce (like my parents ). Theres still something magical about weddings. Guess I sound like a real loser but whatever. Hopefully I have a good time and start to tear up. Oh btw, Its my cousin whose getting married. Lets see how it goes.
Why is it that I let myself cry over things that shouldnt hold any kind of significance to me?. I let certain people get somewhat close to me and then I always end up getting hurt for it, in the bitter end. Then Im the mean or cold one. When all I did was give myself completely to someone and then they take it and throw it away as if it meant nothing to them. Life is too short to be sad over trivial things and people. I wish I could go back in time and do alot of things differently. Maybe I wouldnt be as fucked up as I am now. Then again I wouldnt of experienced so many things and be more aware of my surroundings. I wouldnt of learned how people can be. Sucks that this is only the beginning. Theres more assholes and bitches to come across.
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