Killing Me Softly?

Why can't I get what I want? Why Im the last to know everything? Why am I the first to know things I dont want to know? Why am I still sad? Why am I still angry? Why can't you leave me alone? Why did I wake up today? Why do I breathe? How do I breathe? Why am I still listening to The Fugees lol? Why do I try and keep in touch with people who are in there own world now? Why do I turn off my phone every night around nine and lay in bed with all my thoughts? Why do people call me only to annoy me? Why can't I be a musician already? Who will ever hear me sing for real? Who will ever hear my songs? Where will I be in 10 years? Will I still befriend all the same people? Will I still be haunted by "there" ghosts? Will I ever fall in love? Will I die soon? Will someone put me out of my misery? Will I make it to 21? Do I want to make it to 21? Why so many unanswered questions?

Benevolence

What has this world come to? We are living as caged animals in a zoo Pacing the floor and feeling confined Wondering, Is it safe to go outside ? Seclusion is not the way to hide Do something beneficial for mankind Why are people being so cruel? These narcissisic performances are of a fool Ruthless foolish acts of a cowardly soul Filled with hard-heartedness, think they're in control Infrequency of love and respect are so real Kindness is what a human heart should never conceal A transformation of kindness for this world must succeed So the insane numbness of the cowardly will concede Restoration of instilled morals must come to pass If not, rational mankind will not last We have the choice of being cruel or kind Benevolence is what I choose to benefit and restore mankind


By Catherine R. Misenheimer


I love this poem. Truly a work of art.

"These Walls"

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Seriously dude they did. So happy I got out of this house with so many unwanted memories, and boredom. Met up with everyone at the living room. Which turns ut is a pretty cool place with dim lights and candles, and everyones focus is on the musician. Its like everyone is in a trance. Awesome place and so hope to be back there soon. Maybe evn performing myself with Awilda. Met Teddy Geiger as you can see (Awesome guy, even more awesome for playing "These Walls", that song got me through some hard nights believe it or not) Amazing musician, with amazing people. I swear I felt inspired I came home and started singing, since all the places where I used to go to release everything pretty much sucks now. Hopefully one day I can write some awesome music that I can sing to people one day, Til then Im still broke living in Jamaica Queens, struggling like everyone else now. But hey If Fifty-Cent can do it, why not me?

At Last

Fist off I must congratulate Barack Obama!!!!!!!!!! Hes our new president, I know hell do the best he can as our new president. Lord knoes Its going to be hard for him to fix all of Bushs mistakes, but as long as we all give him a chance, and stand by him hell be the best president. I just finished watching The Obamas dance to "At Last" by beyonce on channel seven. It was so beautiful, I cried. You can tell the love between them is so genuine and real. Its the kind of love that we all want to find out there. Im so happy they found it in each other. They look beautiful together, and maybe one day Ill find someone special like that. God bless The Obamas. Now Im going to continue watching the rest of the show, peace <3

Whose Going To Catch Me When I Fall?

Atiya

Today didn't go as planned, but It went even better. I hung out with an old friend, like I was supposed to anyways, but cancelled because I was supposed to go to karaoke. Karaoke isnt the same for me, I wasnt in the mood to go, plus I realized I was dead broke, so I was pretty okay with it not working out. I had a pretty relaxing day, I was distracted, so I wasnt thinking too much. No constant reminder of what I dont have, instead I was thankful for the things I do have in my life. Hanging out with this chick was interesting/breezy. Still feels like were at different points in our life, but happy we can get back to being somewhat close like before. Shes a completely different girl, in alot of ways better, and so am I?. Im not the same person I used to be. Alot has happened that has changed me for better or for worse? Im not too sure yet. Anyways going to eat, listen to some more bloc party( forgot how kick ass this band is and wants to go to there concert) then watch the brave one. Always heard good things about that movie, well see If its true.

"A Hard Days Night"

Woke up this morning, upset that i was still breathing. Then realized I shouldnt be upset at that. I had a purpose, to wish my best friend a happy birthday. Hope she has a kick ass birthday. So sorry Ive been distant for the last couple of days, Ive just been in my own world. Needed sometime to regroup, and get back on track, focus on what I need to focus on. Around 10 arrived at work...worked to damn hard for minimum wage, went out to eat with my friend, talked about how dumb guys are, went home, came online to upload Katy Perrys Thinking Of You video (Im so not) on my zune, tried to go to sleep but couldnt got an unexpected call from an old friend again, and now Im online trying to tell you all about my hard days night. OH and i left out the most important thing thats been in my head all night....I want to be in the music business already.

"[Climbing] Up The [Walls]?"

I did something that I know Im not going to regret. I deleted my myspace. I was sick and tired of all the drama, and shit it brought into my life. Supposedly its a place for a friends, but what it really is, is a place for friendships to end, for people to talk shit, instead of saying it to your face, a place for everyone to pretend, a place of lies. Some say Ill put another one back up, but I highly.. HIGHLY, doubt that! Im through with myspace, Its apart of my past, and I really dont want to look back at it. If i put another one back up, Ill be looking to be hurt again, and I dont want to hurt anymore. Today was a very boring day, it consisted of me waking up watching a bunch of movies, eating like the fat ass I am, talking on the phone, listening to music, and sleeping. Im so through with being bored. I tend to think alot, about stuff, and It sucks. Alot of my friends say I should be more "outgoing". First off Im not an outgoing person, and I never have been. Secondly the point in my life when I tried to be outgoing I got hurt. So Id rather wollow in my pity than put myself back out there...at least for now.